Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace

Hi,

I’m Alix and it’s my mission to help as many adults as possible work in jobs that they’re passionate about making them happy and fulfilled.

This website was created and is being developed for those searching to make their working life better, who want to fulfil their full potential and offers a ‘virtual mentor’ hand holding support system for anyone who may not have any to hand.

Join me in making sure you’re one of the new generation working in a job you love, while absolutely smashing it along the way.

Today we’re looking at emotional intelligence. It’s a term that I’ve seen come up often recently so I’ve done some research which, added to my own experiences in the workplace, will give you the knowledge and understanding to use it for your benefit.

The article is written mostly from an in-the-workplace viewpoint, what it is, why you need it, what its main characteristics are and how to develop and enhance it, but any soft skill will overflow into your personal life too making your everyday interaction with others special.

What it is…

Simply put, emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and take into account the emotions of your colleagues, clients and anyone else you deal with.

In a workplace, it’s the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes.

Developing keen emotional intelligence skills will guide you in managing those around you, giving you the knowledge you need when handling different personalities.

There are several aspects that make up emotional intelligence, some of which are inbuilt, some that are learnt as we mature and some that can be developed to enhance your abilities when using them.

It’s a definite soft skill needed when managing people and your own manager will note it when considering promotions.

Why you need it…

We all know that colleagues are made up of diverse characters: negative and positive; meek and confident; arrogant; and, unfortunately, a few that are bullies.

Emotional intelligence will give you the tools you need to manage these personalities, from allowing you to build trust and a smooth leadership role, to reducing misunderstandings or conflict when they clash.

Emotional intelligence also gives you the means to cope with sudden changes of focus coming down from senior management, when, having proved your leadership qualities, your colleagues will follow you confidently, not let the changes derail them but changing their focus accordingly.

What are its main characteristics…

Emotional intelligence consists of several different character aspects, the use of which will give you the tools to reap the rewards.

A brief list is effective communication; mentorship qualities; actively forging better relationships; and your providing motivation and inspiration just by understanding the emotions and characters of those around you will provide you with the ability you need to have an effective teamwork model.

Below are the major components, most of which, I trust you’ll find, are simply common-sense when dealing with others.

The first is empathy, always a huge part of working with others of course and in particular, when you’re supervising others, so let’s dive right in.

Empathy

Empathy is knowing, understanding and acknowledging your colleagues’ emotions.

Although it’s best not to take homelife into work, it’s not always possible to shut it out or compartmentalise it.

So, through the use of empathy, you’ll be able to sense when a colleague is either becoming, or is already, overwhelmed by home or work issues and, again, you’ll be able to temper your dealings with them so as to offer support through being more, say, gentler than usual to help prevent their going under.

By knowing your colleagues, you can take into account, for instance, the fact that they’re worrying about their child taking important exams or the stress of planning their own wedding and may be distracted. You’ll then be able to make sure they’re concentrating when you give them instructions, actually hearing what they need to do, thereby getting a better response and achieving the best results.

Note: When I make a mistake, I don’t sleep for days worrying, so ‘going in hard’ and making sure I know I’ve messed up, apportioning blame at someone like me will only make me feel worse than I already do.

Breaking down a colleague’s confidence can have a lasting impact on your relationship with them and affect your team’s performance. So, having empathy, you’d already know that about your colleague (me) and work towards fixing the challenge, rather than dwelling on apportioning blame so you can beat them (me) up about it.

Knowing you

Conversely, by knowing yourself, you’ll be able to take into account your own emotions on a daily basis.

For instance, we all have days when our tempers are not at their best, be it through lack of sleep or it simply being one of those days when you’re feeling less than a hundred-percent. But, by knowing yourself, you can avoid passing any frustration, short temper or downright anger onto others and, on those worst days, you can actively avoid others altogether to reduce the risk of passing it on to others that don’t deserve it.

By knowing yourself, you’ll be able to manage your reactions to others and stay the calm, composed, approachable and resilient manager, your colleagues rely on (especially when they’re going through a bad day themselves).

You’ll also fully know your own strengths when asked to perform tasks, say when they’re being dished out at a team meeting and, conversely, your limitations in the same situation so that you take on what you excel at and leave others to deal with the things they excel at, thereby producing the best results possible.

Again, we all know that challenges happen in the workplace, they’re inevitable, but how you manage yourself and others during these will help you remain constructive when they crop up and you’ll be able to put aside your emotions to deal with them calmly and effectively. (You can always scream into a pillow later!)

And I can assure you that these efforts will be noticed by senior management.

Inspiration

By making a conscious effort to inspire others, you can be the one to keep the positive attitude alive to achieve goals. Concentrating on this aspect can keep your mind off any of your own problems – at least while you’re with your colleagues.

Face challenges from a ‘how do we do this’ and ‘who’s the best to do which part’ viewpoint and your team will follow your lead, achieve heaps more and, perhaps more importantly, pass that on when they become managers or team leaders.

You can show through your mentorship attitude that being driven by your own internal positive attitude rather than just because of external rewards, together you’ll achieve much more.

And by just knowing your own and colleagues’ emotional triggers, you’ll be able to avoid them and, if these are triggered, accidentally or deliberately, by others, step right in and handle the situation calmly leading to faster resolutions while at the same time keeping everyone happy.

By managing those around you effectively you’ll show mentor qualities others will want to follow – a huge personal achievement that will ripple outwards.

How to enhance your emotional intelligence…

So now let’s look at ways to enhance emotional intelligence.

Mindfulness can help to increase your self-awareness. It keeps you in the moment and, therefore, aware of what’s going on around you, enabling you to step in to face any potential issues before any harm’s done.

Know your own coping strategies for dealing with challenges at work. It’s critical for you to put these into play when necessary. And remember, sometimes just knowing you only have to get through the next five minutes can help. And then you can look to the following five minutes and so on.

Develop your listening skills – listening to others properly, not ‘hearing’ what you expect you’re going to and jumping in before actually comprehending what someone is saying will greatly improve your emotional intelligence skills. This skill alone will encourage people to come to you knowing you’ll take the time and give them the courtesy of actually listening to what they’re saying. This also includes hearing the tone being used and noting the person’s body language – all pointers to use with both colleagues and clients to make it easier for you to react to.

Develop your communication skills – being able to communicate effectively will also help. When explaining anything, do it on a level that the listener will understand, avoid jargon and abbreviations. This will truly save you both time in the long run.

Be approachable – would you rather be the one colleagues know they can go to, for whatever reason, or the one that no one will even alert to the fact that the coffee is running out, rightly wary of what your response will be.

Note: there are further articles on our website on the above soft skills if you feel you would benefit from delving deeper into these. Feel free to come in, hang around and stay a while.

Conclusion…

Developing emotional intelligence in the office place will make you a better manager, enhance your promotional prospects and could offer better job security. A firm would be foolish to let go a brilliant person-manager who their colleagues respect.

Note: my father was a bank manager. As part of his employer’s strategy, he was moved after a couple of years to a different team. Within a month five of his original team had resigned with another group applying for jobs elsewhere in the bank. Probably needless to say, he was moved back pretty sharpish.

Emotional intelligence will also make your day-to-day life easier and more fulfilling, less stressful as potential conflicts are nipped in the bud and, where you actively build confidence in them, your colleagues’ lives made better.

We all have to spend many hours at work and making it the best it can be makes total sense.

And, of course, an added bonus is that your dealings with others outside work will benefit from the same source of abilities – a win-win all round!

Take care until I see you again,